Why I Became An Herbalist (and a 6 month journey to remembering that)

Back in January I came down with the flu and had a few bouts with kidney stones. Due to an unexpected series of events for our family, I didn't care for myself the way I normally would. I ended up in the hospital with no insurance and I want to finally share my experience.

My family is not super well off in the ways of money. We never really have been. Insurance for my husband and I is a luxury. I know for some that sounds absolutely crazy. I was excited when Obama Care first came out. I wanted to believe that finally insurance would be affordable for us. It didn't work out that way. We are one of those middle cases. Somewhere in between poverty and middle ground. So just for me insurance would be over $400 a month. JUST FOR ME! This was the reason I became an herbalist in the first place. I knew we couldn't afford insurance but if I could keep us well and strong. If I could take care of the small things. Maybe the big things would be so few and far between that we could manage. Maybe with a little prayer they wouldn't happen at all.

That wasn't the case in February though. I kept getting these weird on and off fevers and felt ok but off. I knew my lungs hurt a little but I just kept telling myself that was remnants from the flu. Until one day after trying my herbs every which way, my fever spiked to 105. My first thought was of the financial burden I was going to put on my family. MY FIRST THOUGHT WAS MONEY. Not my own life. How crazy is that! But I knew things had crossed a dangerous threshold and I needed help. So I called my husband at work. He came and picked me up, took me to the hospital, and left me there because he had to go back to work. We have to eat and all. I thought surely I just had the flu again and they would tell me to go home. I couldn't breathe to walk down the hall in the ER. They had to get me a wheelchair. I ended up with severe pneumonia and a severe kidney infection which had grown into sepsis. I was in the hospital for a week. Three of those days I was in ICU. I had to have an IV placed directly in my jugular because my blood vessels wouldn't cooperate anywhere else.

After I got out, I contacted the financial department of the hospital like I was instructed to do. They helped me fill out all the paperwork to get on temporary Medicaid BECAUSE MY DEDUCTABLE WOULD BE $15,000 and I had well over that in medical bills. There was also a program through the UNC Healthcare network that would help me pay for the $15,000. I was approved for everything but it wasn't easy. I had to have all the paperwork for our taxes and paystubs and more. Which I will say is worth it for peace of mind in the debt department! All of this gave me Medicaid for 6 months.

You should have seen the looks from the nurses and doctors at my follow up appt. and all the other appt. after that when I told them I hadn't seen a doctor in 7+ years. I only saw that doctor because my gallbladder was infected. I said I hadn't had a pap or a physical in 10+ years. So this doctor sent me through the wringer! I had breathing tests, sleep apnea tests, kidney ultrasounds.... You name it! He couldn't find anything wrong with my except I am overweight and have slight restless leg syndrome. There was one stone in my bladder that he told me he thought was a polyp but I took some gravel root tea with a few other urinary tonics and it was gone when I went back. I want to mention one doctor by name, Dr. Glenn Burris. He was my sleep doctor and if anyone in Caldwell Co., NC needs one, he is amazing and has the best bed-side-manner I saw through all this. He went over my entire medical chart with me because he knew that keeping me informed of my health would ease my fears and I am not sure if I can ever express the gratitude I felt. He even understood that I would rather use herbs than take medications if that is an option. My main doctor just seemed to want to scare me into more test and medicine. I stopped seeing him all together because of that.

Over those six months I ended up going to the dentist a million times to fix issues to which I still have a few but maybe at tax time I can try and go back. I also started seeing a therapist whom I love. I have an anxiety disorder and she helped me find coping tools to get through it without medication since I can't be on anything without insurance.

Then I finally went and got that pap. It was abnormal which I have posted about in a previous blog post. By the way that surgery went well and since there was no outer stitches it was relatively easy. My doctor was awesome. After all is said and done on that subject I am glad I did it. If for no other reason than I am not worried my cervix will take me too soon from this life.

Now I am without insurance again but I know I am really healthy which is good. I can't help but wonder though if I had some sort of insurance that was affordable before if I wouldn't have gotten my pneumonia and kidney infection checked out sooner. If I couldn't have saved the tax payers more money by staying out of the hospital and definitely out of ICU. I guess we will never know but I am sure I am not the only person in the US this has happened to. That is why I want to share my story. A lot of people have opinions on the way they think things are or should be. All of this is more complicated an issue than most think. There are those of us that fall through the cracks and it is crazy that the financial burden comes to mind before the care for ourselves. I wish I didn't have to rely on Medicaid to help me. I wish I wasn't some burden to the healthcare system and the tax payers. I don't like feeling like a freeloader. The guilt is real. This is why I teach herbalism to anyone who will listen because it might save some money for them and their family or maybe their life in keeping them strong against the super bad things. Remembering we are not completely alone and that these wild weeds we see can help us. 

Take care of yourself. 

💖